Today is Mother’s Day. Yesterday Denny asked me whether I would find it a difficult day. My own mother died in August 2011. I said it wouldn’t be difficult. Missing my mother comes and goes in waves. I always miss her, some days more than others, but I’ve never had the impression that which day it was had any influence. Now it is Mother’s Day and on Facebook I see loads of messages coming by from people who are going to visit their moms, or people who are being spoiled because they are moms. Oh yes. That’s something I didn’t think about. Damn it – I don’t have a mom and I’m not one myself. Stupid. I see a beautiful message come by on Facebook from Jolanda, from Embrasse Kraamzorg and I decide to share it and in that way I also give my mother something: “I send a flying kiss to heaven and say: thank you mom, for the beautiful life you gave me!” For a bit of positivity on the day. A lot of people react, wishing me strength, but it’s not my intention to be sad or pathetic. I’m proud that I got this far and I agree so much with the part which says “for the beautiful life you gave me” I want to remember that. 🙂
In the evening we take out all the papers for the IVF because we need to fill them all in before the intake tomorrow. When I look at what I need to fill in I see that the form says “gegevens wensmoeder”, which literally translates to “details wish-mother”. Wish-mother.
Oh, so I am a mother this Mother’s Day. I’m a wish-mother. ♥